Hiatus

Oh hey guys...

I'm back.

My life has been slightly crazy the past few months so I had to take a small hiatus in order to keep my sanity :)

I guess quite a bit has changed since I last posted anything. Things are still going good though. I still have my good and bad days; I don't think those will stop until he comes home. 

As of today, I have 9 months and 8 days until Justin is released. I won't be able to see him in person until about a week after that though. I am definitely looking forward to that phone call though.

Oh man. I don't even know what to write about. It's just been too long! I kinda can't believe how much time has passed since I saw him last. It seems like so much has changed, but I really think things are mostly the same. We're both a little more secure with what we're doing though. He's really settled in to the missionary life and is absolutely loving it. He's being the classic Justin and got permisison from his mission president to start learning spanish, as well as french, to better teach those he comes in contact with. He was made the district leader a few weeks back and has definitely been feeling the pressure from that, but is loving being able to step up and do more. 

I am home from school until January and am surviving. Hah. I'm working between 45 and 60 hours every week. I kinda want to die sometimes, but I'm dealing. It keeps me busy, which is really good. Here's why:

This far into the wait, I feel numb 98% of the time, sad 1.9% of the time, and happy 0.1% of the time. It is so. hard. I honestly don't know what I would do if I wasn't so busy. I think I would be in a bad place all the time. Everything I do outside of work reminds me of him (there's that 0.1%) and then I remember that he's not here and won't be for another 9 months (the 1.9%) and then I can't remember what it's really like to have him around (98%). It's a weird feeling to have. I know he's real. I talk to him every Monday. He tells me he loves me. I tell him I love him. We talk about our week. We talk about how we are doing. We say we love each other again, and then it's over for another 7 days. I know he's there, but it's just so easy to forget. 

But I have to admit, I personally believe that it's easier this way. I'm not near as sad as I was for the first few months. I hate not being able to remember the exact way his voice sounds (thank goodness I still have his laugh stuck in my head) and remembering what it felt like to walk hand in hand with him wherever we went. But that's what keeps me encouraged to keep going. I know if I just hold on for another few months, he'll be back and we'll get to remember all those things again. We'll get to relive them forever and ever :) 

Things are good. I can't really complain. In 2.5 short months, I'll be going back to school, and when I move back home, he'll be there. 

(I could cry at the thought of that)

 Welp, that's all I've got this time around. I'll try to post a little bit more now that I feel like I have a bit of a handle on my crazy life. :) 

Have a wonderful undisclosed amount of time until I'm back!