A Little Advice

Here's a small bit of advice for all the girls who are on the new end of the wait. 

In a little less than a month, I will be able to say that I am halfway done, and I like to think that qualifies me to give a little bit of advice. Maybe it doesn't. But we'll pretend. 

Here's my bit of advice for the night. 

It is perfectly okay to cry. In fact, I encourage it. 

The past couple months have been hard for me. Not because I miss him so much, and I just want him home. That comes every once in a while, and I'm happy when it does. It has been so hard for me because I feel absolutely nothing. I read his letters and emails and feel absolutely nothing. I have become numb to his absense. 

Just today, I got a package from Justin. Included was a 4 page letter. When I finished reading it, I hated the way I felt. I wanted to be jumping for joy because I got to hear from him on a day other than Monday. I wanted to cry happy tears becasue I miss him and love him so dang much. But none of that happened. That used to happen on a regular basis in the first 6 or so months, but I hardly ever feel that way anymore. 

I got my homework done early tonight so I decided to treat myself to a movie. I ended up watching "You're Not You". It's originally rated R, but I borrowed a edited version from a friend. It's quite the tear-jerker. I don't think I have ever cried so hard watching a movie. Just go watch the trailer and you'll want to get your hands on it.  

But I finally felt something. I wasn't numb anymore. 

I began thinking about Justin and wished more than anything that we could be physically together right at that moment. 

Then I put my iPod on shuffle and the song "I Know You Care" by Ellie Goulding came on. I completely lost it. That song triggers a lot of other feelings and memories from high school, but those on top of how I was feeling right then almost brought out the ugly cry. 

But it felt so good. 

After I got it all out, I felt this huge weight lifted off my shoulders. 

So many people in the world believe it's so important to be strong and to keep your emotions inside. 

Basically they're telling you to deny your nature. 

Crying is a completly normal thing to do, and for me, relieves so much stress. Sometimes you just need a good cry to make yourself feel a little better. 

It also makes you tired which makes bed time so so so much better. 

So. My point is, just cry it out. Make yourself feel something. Don't numb yourself like society is telling you to do. Be emotional. You can't properly function with all those emotions built up. Believe me, I know from experience.

So now, go find a sad movie, listen to some sad songs, and feel. 

Then go take a nap. :)